Trust me...

[noteasytobepink]

Who: Clarice and some kids! And maaaaybe the sheriff's department.
When: Some time after the first year of being stuck on Bill's world, just after she joins the sheriff's department after her florist job.
What: Being a deputy does NOT mean that she can't lie about things a little!

"Hey, you gonna be alright out there rookie?" The snickering was definitely something she could do without. "Those streets get tough about this time of day!"

She glanced up mildly at the rest of the desks around her before leaning down to tighten the straps on her boots. They were tight and double knotted, good. Same for the slow check of her belt and gear, then the brush of fingers up her buttons as she straightened. All in order, picture perfect, and even better everyone's gaze was shying away from hers as she looked around. Better. It was always easier to make the 'senior' people in any business uncomfortable than to try to start shit. Better they avoid ogling the sheriff's girlfriend than have her toss one or two out a window.

No matter how tiresome their joking got. "I believe I can handle myself," she noted mildly as she checked the end of her braided hair. Yes, still secure. All was well with the world. And Jamie was even blushing. Wasn't that cute? "Stay out of trouble oldsters, I won't be here to save you." Okay, maybe a little tail tweaking? A tiny bit.

Yeah, they were totally going to steal her desk chair or something. Or throw pencils at her. Or any number of non-lethal things that tended to make her giggle. Giggling was easy in Wheelsy. She made it out the door while the rest of the crew were arguing over who was actually 'old'. Rather than dwell on the minor victory she glanced up at swore. Almost out of time! "Nice one Clarice..." she muttered, stretching out into a run.

She'd make it.

Barely.

The school bell was ringing as she hopped the last fence across from the bus lot, and she barely beat the munchkins to the cross walk.

She'd laughed when Bill told her it was a necessary job. Really. Cross walks were kinda self explanatory and everyone in town knew where the crosswalk was. They wouldn't mow down kids on purpose, right? This world just...wasn't like that. "Alright, line 'em up kiddos!" she darted across the street to make sure they sorted into lines (lines were easier to handle, right?).

...did they even KNOW what lines were?! "NOT SO FAST!" She snapped, snagging one kid by his hood as he tried to dart across. "Police lady says she WILL dangle you if you try to ditch her!" JUST SAYING!

"BILLY STOP PUSHING!"

"I'M NOT YOU'RE JUST A SLOWPOKE!"

"YOU'RE GONNA GET ARRESTED!"

"Hey, hey Clarice?" She looked down, bemused as one of the youngest stopped in the center of the street to tug on her arm. "Hey, my brother says you're not really pink! No people are really pink!"

...right. "We're in the road," she pointed out. "Tell me that again when we're on the sidewalk okay?" Anything to keep them moving? Besides, that had been...unintentionally stinging. Real people COULD BE PINK. Or Blue. Or Green. Or any other color. Mutants were people too after all, no matter what various realities claimed!

Sidewalk, blessed sidewalk.

"So why are you pink?!"

Right. She sighed and sank down on her heels so that she could be on eye level with the kindergartner. "Well, can you keep a secret?"

"Yes!"

That was good. "I'm only a cop during the day," she admitted.

"So what are you at night?"

"A fairy princess. I'm hiding from an evil king who took away my castle so it's important you don't tell anyone okay?"

"Not even my brother?"

"Not even him. The evil king has spies everywhere and you don't him to hear you telling your brother right?"

The little girl dug her sneaker at the sidewalk for a moment then nodded firmly, "I don't want that. Can you do magic tricks?"

"Only at night." Vampire fairy princess? Sure.

"Do you have wings?!"

"...no. I was hurt and lost my wings. That's why Sheriff Pardy had to take me to the hospital."

"Ohhhhhhh...did it hurt? Did you get a shot?"

"Yes and yes, but it's okay, I'm still alive and that's what matters right?"

"If I'm really good can you show me some magic? I can stay up until eight on Fridays and Saturdays!"

"We'll see kiddo. I may need to do other things to keep everyone safe okay? But we'll see." She spotted the munchkin's mom coming up the walk and grinned, "remember, it's a secret."

"Okay!" And off she went.

Well then. She was betting it was only going to be a few hours before the sheriff's office got calls about corrupting the children or something but it had been fun! Show her some magic tricks indeed...all the tricks she knew weren't good for kids in a world like this one.

It was barely past school letting out so she decided to hang around and escort EVERYONE who wanted to cross the street. Why not after all? It was a SERIOUS job and such.

Wheelsy. Had to love it huh?

Comments

[noteasytobepink]

"I'm a high energy girl," she pointed out easily, "I won't settle down, but you let me run around in the woods and such without complaint so it works out." And did he really want their love life to settle down into predictable?

"I'd tell you if you were, Bill. We have our fights and our moments, but I don't do the passive aggressive thing." There was never anything passive about her aggression as far as she was aware? "And you'd tell me if I was driving you nuts."

[wheelsy_sheriff]

"Different kind of settle," he smiled, reaching over to steal a piece of meat.

"I know you don't, an' I know I'm lucky enough to not have got you mad enough to see the kind of aggressive you do do," He teased. She was definitely the violent kind of aggressive.

[noteasytobepink]

"I know," she offered with a small, sad little smile. She couldn't talk about the other kind though.

"Annnnd yes, I'm the abusive one!" She laughed, waving a pepper at him. "But you like me anyway!" Go figure!

[wheelsy_sheriff]

He wasn't sure what to make of those sad notes in her smile and voice, but was afraid to press. He studied her a moment, then decided to keep on the line of the familiar banter.

"Could be 'cause I'm crazy," he said with a shrug. "But more likely because you got a lot of good qualities an' maybe that happens to be one of 'em." In its weird way!

[noteasytobepink]

He wouldn't like hearing it again so yes, best they just avoided it.

"Mmmm, touch of the masochist in you babe?" she teased. "Who would ever have guessed! And it's a good kind of crazy, I promise."

[wheelsy_sheriff]

"Lot of people, actually," he noted. Considering his history, especially with women...

"I can live with bein' the good kind of crazy."

[noteasytobepink]

"Oh, well, I just didn't get the memo then..." she mused. Ah well, at least the town wouldn't be surprised and all?

"And good. The alternative sucks, plus can you imagine what they'd do to me if the town sheriff died on my watch?!"

[wheelsy_sheriff]

"Yep, you'd probably be in trouble," he laughed with a nod. "So you best take care of me."

[noteasytobepink]

"'Take care of' is such a broad concept though..." she teased. "I mean sometimes it involves concrete, sometimes lingerie..."

[wheelsy_sheriff]

"Let's go with the kind that doesn't involve me being dead," he decided. "And the kind with lingerie is always a safe bet."

A beat.

"As long as you're the one wearin' it."

[noteasytobepink]

"Again preferring you not dead..." she laughed. 'And you wouldn't wear lingerie for me?" Really, he wouldn't?

At all?

[wheelsy_sheriff]

Bill made a face to express how much that idea really shouldn't appeal to her.

"No, sorry."

[noteasytobepink]

"Awwww, but I like fancy underwear..." she laughed. "Not even a little?"

[wheelsy_sheriff]

He tilted his head at her, already shaking it even as he asked, "What do you mean by 'fancy'?"

[noteasytobepink]

"Oh, you know, silk of lace, something touchable but eye catching. Leather looks delicious but it chafes after a while and we don't want that..."

[wheelsy_sheriff]

"No, no chafin', please. I'm not wearin' anything frilly, either." So that tossed lace right out the window in his opinion.

"An' nothin' that's gonna ride up places things shouldn't go." So a thong was definitely not an option.

If she could work with things outside of those constraints then maybe, Maybe he'd consider it.

[noteasytobepink]

"Mmmm, but it's okay to want to see me things that are hellish to wear?" she teased. Was that the message he really wanted to spread now hmmm?

[wheelsy_sheriff]

"No, course not," he answered with a chuckle. "But y'already like frilly stuff and all. And you'd look a damn sight better in it than I would."

[noteasytobepink]

"I do?" she blinked. "Since when?"

[wheelsy_sheriff]

"Well y'wear dresses you make yourself," he pointed out. "Maybe they don't got frills, but some of 'em are sure a lot tighter than anything I wear."

[noteasytobepink]

That? That made her blink, then she near fell out of her chair laughing. Really? REALLY? "Babe...a secret you guys never caught on to? It's so much easier to hide weaponry with a skirt than pants." Do the important bits tight so they didn't snag on anything, she could carry more weaponry with less fuss if she had flowing fabric to hide it in!

[wheelsy_sheriff]

Bill eyed her while she busted a gut laughing.

"Yeah, well concealin' weapons ain't really a priority of mine," he drawled.

[noteasytobepink]

"No," she agreed, trying to cut the laughter back to chuckles. SHE WAS TRYING OKAY?! But just because a girl wears dresses doesn't mean they appeal to her. Just like sometimes when a man wears ties or uniforms it isn't their thing but a necessary battle piece."

[wheelsy_sheriff]

"Yeah, but you wear 'em all the time," he countered. "And ain't had a battle once." At least as far as the kind she'd described being in on her trips to other worlds.

The closest they'd been to an even like that was a bar fight, and that hardly counted.

[noteasytobepink]

"Best to stay in practice," she admitted with a shrug, "and I'm used to the freedom of limb movement. Wouldn't find decent fights in your sleepy town anyway." Sneaking off to the city though...

...or over the border...